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1. shazzan

   

   140 posts
   Registered:
   06 Nov 2018
   16 Nov 2018

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   Hello  Everyone:
   
   Yesterday i wanted to ask a question of  Eagerquit and he /she so graciously responded . So today i thought, why not change my summons to Eagerquit and make it a message board for all to use. I am sure i am not the only one who has run into this problem. I saw  that MudMan wanted to respond to my question to him, but could not, was frustrated and complained that the site was slow to administration  . Even if he did answer  i would have to find  where I had posted the question . THE MESSAGE BOARD  would be somewhere to ask a question of someone in particular and a place to retrieve their answer.  Maybe the site  could upgrade this idea in the future. So please all check if someone needs an answer from You. 
   
   
   
   
   
   
   Thanks for responding so quickly Eagerquit.
   You once responded to someone having a hard time concentrating and getting past the 22 hours. You advised her to read an article in psychology Today ..... about nicotine.   The site is no longer available. Curious if you remember what the article was about and could you please share?
   
   is there a way to chat directly on this site?
   
   Is there a way to contact someone (like i have you)  as to get responses without having to open/search every thread i have created?
   
   Thanks for your help. I see you are an active member and have many useful experiences and suggestions. Thanks,
   
   

   Last modified on 17 Nov 2018 20:00 by shazzan
2. marianne, quit coach

   

   278 posts
   Registered:
   30 Nov 2017
   17 Nov 2018

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   Hello Shazzan,
   
   At this time there isn't an option on this site to contact someone directly.   I don't know the article or content you are looking for.  However, if you are wanting to know about keeping the focus, perhaps practicing mindfulness can be of help?  A few steps are noted below you can try:      
   
   S.T.O.P. 
   Time: 1 to 3 minutes
   
   
   
   Stop what you’re doing; put things down for a minute.
   
   Take a few deep breaths. If you’d like to extend this, you can take a minute to breathe normally and naturally and follow your breath coming in and out of your nose. You can even say to yourself “in” as you’re breathing in and “out” as you’re breathing out if that helps with concentration.   
                                
   Observe your experience just as it is—including thoughts, feelings, and emotions. You can reflect about what is on your mind and also notice that thoughts are not facts, and they are not permanent. Notice any emotions present and how they’re being expressed in the body. Research shows that just naming your emotions can turn the volume down on the fear circuit in the brain and have a calming effect. Then notice your body. Are you standing or sitting? How is your posture? Any aches or pains? 
   
   Proceed with something that will support you in the moment: talk to a friend, rub your shoulders, have a cup of tea. Treat this whole exercise as an experiment: Get curious about where there are opportunities in the day for you to just STOP—waking up in the morning, taking a shower, before eating a meal, at a stop light, before sitting down at work and checking email. You can even use your smartphone’s message indicator as a reminder to STOP, cultivating more mindfulness with technology. What would it be like in the days, weeks, and months ahead if you started stopping more often?
   
   Elisha Goldstein (Aug 2013)
   
   There are other skills/strategies of course that we and others can pass on, let us know.  
   
   Best Wishes!
   
   Marianne

   Last modified on 17 Nov 2018 09:42 by marianne, quit coach
3. shazzan

   

   140 posts
   Registered:
   06 Nov 2018
   17 Nov 2018 in reply to marianne, quit coach

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   Thanks for the advice Marianne. 
   
   I was just wondering about Eagerquits findings on Psychology Today.  I do believe psychology is the key to  quitting for good .  Until we stop craving, because we feel deprived of what we THOUGHT the cigarette was doing for us, it makes it hard to stay quit. Until we can know for sure that we really are free, we have doubt, and hence don't achieve the true freedom.  (that is what i was experiencing when i asked if i had to have another cigarette to complete the ritual in Allen Carr's book. I didn't want to jeopardize the procedure to become a Happy Non-Smoker...... because i had one little doubt) 
   
   When you finally understand that smoking did absolutely nothing for you. Nicotine in fact hi-jacked your brain, and  is definitely not a friend. Can you decisively WANT to quit. permanently, and be a Happy Non Smoker because you will not feel deprived (why would you crave for something you no longer want, that was in fact an illusion that cost your money and health)
   .Now I  do not know anything about psychology but I,  as have many others , have quit smoking. But are they Happy? Do they still crave?  Are cravings making them miserable?  A craving starts every time you put out a cigarette. (nicotine) Are they afraid they will start again and just start the vicious cycle all over again, only to  despising themselves for succumbing.and further destroy their health. 
   
   My quit was relatively easy   i think because i wanted to , i believed i could and would. And did! I may have had fleeting nano-seconds of an urge once past the nicotine withdrawal. but no desire to smoke.  I read Allan Carr's book just to reinforce my quit..... but anyone who still has cravings really needs to read it too. (as well as any nicotine user)
   
   Open your minds and be free!
4. eagerquit

   

   415 posts
   Registered:
   07 Mar 2018
   17 Nov 2018

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   Hi Shazzan,
   
   I have been enjoying your posts. You have some great ideas for keeping the quit and kudos to you for sharing them.
   
   The Psychology Today article is at https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/basics/smoking. There are also four links at the side and one at the end of the article.
   
   I hope this helps.
   
   Eagerquit
   
   
   
5. shazzan

   

   140 posts
   Registered:
   06 Nov 2018
   17 Nov 2018 in reply to eagerquit

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   Thanks for the info Eagerquit
   
   I sometimes feel guilty for quitting so easily while other seems to be suffering and struggling so hard. All i can do is try to encourage them to have an open mind. If others quit cold turkey like i did and are having it easy too , maybe together we can convince others.  I have no idea how you quit, how long, what nrts you may or have used. Unless i start actually making notes on everyone.  Hence i made an "introduce yourself  on the Welcome forum" I hope you will engage in this. endeavor and  I hope others will follow.  I think you also believe that the cravings after nicotine are instilled in the mind only.  Just the fact that you posted that Psychology Today link. . I love that you reach out to anyone who is in need of answers or support. I want to do that too. I now also understand Allan Carr's frustration when he couldn't  cure the world of smoking. not to make money, but in a genuine attempt to make Happy Non-Smokers of all who were dedicated to being so. The first step has been taken, People here Want to quit. I want more than that. I want them to be Happy that they quit, not struggling to survive every smoke free day. To do that i believe they need to know what nicotine did. How they can undo its illusion.  I already know the answer. I am happy to be a non-smoker.  They have to believe that they can be too. 
   
   Thanks so much again Eagerquit. Don't forget to introduce yourself.. (and please add whether you still have cravings or your beliefs).  
6. shazzan

   

   140 posts
   Registered:
   06 Nov 2018
   17 Nov 2018 in reply to eagerquit

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   TO  EAGERQUIT
   
   So I have read the bottom link called "Addiction"    It tells you what addiction is and then further below tells you how bad your addiction is.    I rated it as leniently as possible and still came  up with the high score of 7 which determines it to be a severe case.   Funny, no where did they mention smoking or nicotine addiction... Sugar coated it with gambling, heroine and substances.  I would certainly call nicotine a substance. It is about time we open our eyes to the fact that smokers are addicts.    I might add here that it doesn''t matter how much you smoke, you are still addicted. When you extinguish a cigarette the withdrawal (need) starts all over again. One here and there 40 years ago lead to more and more... and more.. The only smoker who doesn't have withdrawal from nicotine is the chain-smoker who doesn't even try to space them out (fight the urge)The only time he isn't smoking is when he is asleep. If withdrawals were really painful, You  would think he would be wakened. (no nicotine for 8 hours?)
   
   If you read some of the side articles, one i totally disagree with.   I don't believe gender/race'social status/intelligence or any other group or classification has a bearing on who is more likely to start smoking  nor are these classes less likely to quit than any other class.   Anyone has the same chance of quitting, even the chain smoker.  All of us began as a social smoker which escalated. 
   
   The article makes it sound like smoking relaxes us and make us more social. They base it on the fact that the group of smokers who  were allowed to smoke was more out going, communicative, was aware of more facial expressions and gestures. The other group had been denied a cigarette for 24 hours..    Now, we all are fighting here for our freedom from smoking.  I think i would be a little disinterested and distracted in a social setting while going through major withdrawal as well. How unfair!
   
   I don't know exactly which link you were referring to Eagerquit. Please enlighten me, and your view point would be appreciated. 
   

   Last modified on 17 Nov 2018 20:16 by shazzan