mrcookiedough
9 posts
Registered:
26 Mar 2024
30 Mar
in reply to
lil_duckie
Hi lil_duckie.
I hear you and I understand. I messed up my own quit plan lots of times and was sorry for it. But we are human here. And we carry on with some kind of determination to get ourselves free.
Know that you have our support and our compassion.
This morning I messed up again. Instead of just the one cig I allowed myself, I had two in a row. That's not the usual, but it doesn't feel like things will get better if I make this new mistake into a regular habit.
For me it's like having two minds. One says, smoke, you need it, and who cares anyway, you'll always be forgiven by those who care about your health. Except, I'm the last one to forgive myself when the deed is done.
I feel certain that most of the problem resides in me. The tools are there for me, but sometimes I just push them away and say to heck with it.
And then when I'm butting out, will come a sort of self disgust. But I'm told and tell myself to carry on with whatever quit scheme I have going.
I know that the way out is clearer if I would only use the tools that are always available to me.
I am on NRT in the form of gum. I also take rests, where I lay down on my side and spend 10 or 20 minutes breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth. This calms me, slows down the heart, and often puts me to sleep for a while. When I wake up, I'm usually more clear headed and rested, and the junk that was in my mind before, is cleared away.
It has been my habit to use mouthwash after a smoke, and to wash my hands and face and pretend I'm a non smoker.
I'm going to try something different today. Instead of gargling after the fact, I'll do it *first*. A freshened mouth seems likely to kill off a lot of the attraction to the taste of a smoke.
Where I failed, is when I didn't grab for my tools immediately upon craving. If I had at least chewed a piece of gum, the longing for nic from a cig would've been shut down right away.
In your case, though I don't know you, may I suggest you freshen your pallet, drink water, gargle too. Your mouth might become a place that wants no part of a cigarette, and you will be reminded of your decision to quit, and with that, will return your determination, letting you overcome a craving without going for the cigarette.
My main problem is not so much the nicotine, but my willingness to act fast when a craving happens.
The way out may be more open to you than you think or feel. I would suggest, like I'm doing for myself, being fast on the trigger. When the craving comes, run to your tools immediately. Don't let the need spend time talking you into a smoke.
You have your own set of tools, as I do, thanks to my quit coaches, thanks to my druggist for providing the nic gum.
This is a long reply, I'm sorry for that. I have so much to say about the subject, and maybe an outsized need to talk about myself.
But just keep going. You will mess up maybe, but you'll go on, as long as you stick with whatever strategies that work best for you.