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1. caitd

   

   1 posts
   Registered:
   27 Sep 2018
   05 Oct 2018

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   So I've white-knuckled it, cold turkey, through the last four days but I'm supposed to have lunch with a friend next tuesday. She's a smoker and I'm not sure how to handle being around it. I've been avoiding friends whom I smoke with and situations I usually smoke in. 
   
   Any hints on how to deal with hanging out with smokers?
2. brieffree

   

   1477 posts
   Registered:
   28 Nov 2017
   05 Oct 2018 in reply to caitd

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   Hi Caitd
   
   I know is an awkward situation that is why you need to be prepare, have some candy with you and you need to tell your friend that you are trying to quit and you need their help. I am sure they will understand and they will support you!
   
   Remember, you quit for you! no one else! No matter any situation you need to be prepare to avid it, if can not, just deal with it, hold your feeling for few moments and will go away.
   
   For me when some else is smoking and I can not avoid it, I hold my breath and walk away! I can not stay!
   
   Congrats in 4 smoke free days! stay strong, you can do this!
   
3. efreeman75

   

   296 posts
   Registered:
   02 Apr 2018
   05 Oct 2018

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   Good morning Caitd - Wow, four days is awesome!!!
   As for having lunch with your friend, brieffree is right on with going prepared and having a plan or plans in place.  Remember, most smokers, if not all, wish they weren't smokers.  I'm sure if you kindly and gently ask, your friend will respect your quit and not smoke in front of you.  If not, rip that filthy death stick from her lips and drop it in her drink!!!  Just kidding (sort of?)
   
   Have a great smoke free day.
   
4. efram, quit coach

   

   235 posts
   Registered:
   29 Nov 2017
   05 Oct 2018

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   Congratulations on your success so far, caitd!
   
   I like that you are anticipating upcoming challenges, enlisting support, and planning ahead!
   
   Brieffree, those are all excellent suggestions. It can help to be prepared with substitutes like candy, to have your friend up-to-date on your quit and how important it is to you, and to remember that this is your choice (and also why it's your choice!). I like the idea of simply walking away too, if need be.
   
   And efreeman75, you made me laugh with your line about dropping the "filthy death stick" in the drink! Hopefully it doesn't come to that, eh? The kind and gentle approach hopefully will do the trick!
   
   Caitd, hopefully by Tuesday you'll also fee more secure in your quit and not so much like you're "white-knuckling" it. For most, it starts getting easier after the first week.
   
   KTQ (Keep The Quit),
   Efram
   
   
5. turningpoint

   

   97 posts
   Registered:
   30 Nov 2017
   05 Oct 2018

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   What's helping me is knowing that despite all the supports in the world, I'm the only one who can do it.  And because I'm the only one, I accept to do it.
   
6. eagerquit

   

   415 posts
   Registered:
   07 Mar 2018
   05 Oct 2018

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   Hi Caitd,
   
   Congratulations on four days smoke free. It will get better as the nicotine leaves your system. As Briefree noted, telling your friend up front that you have quit smoking and soliciting their help is the right thing to do. I don't doubt your friend will understand and accept your efforts. Use the 4 D's. Drink plenty of water with your lunch and enjoying a lively conversation will Distract you from thinking about smoking. Delay any impulse to smoke, The thought will pass. Take a discrete Deep breath.
   
   Wishing you another smoke free day!
   
   Eagerquit
   
7. treepeo

   

   832 posts
   Registered:
   29 Nov 2017
   05 Oct 2018

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   Hi caitd,
   
   First, let me congratulate you on your four smoke free days.  Way to go.
   
   I quit cold turkey, too.  Call me crazy, but I purposely faced all my triggers right off the bat.  For example, I kept my cigarettes right where I could see them for the first month.  When I got a craving, I looked at them and said, this is my choice, I choose not to smoke.  And I then went on to do things to distract myself.
   
   I also hung out with smokers, including two of my sisters who smoke heavily.  They smoked right in front of me in their apartment.  Again, what I told myself was that it was my choice to quit, and also, I was doing something that they didn't have the strength to do.  And that kept me on the straight and narrow.  But we all handle things differently.
   
   See how you feel on Tuesday.  If you are eating out, then your friend will have to step outside to have a cigarette.  Let her go alone.  Who knows, the weather may be lousy, and you can tell yourself how lucky you are not to have to step out in crappy weather any more.  If you are both outside somewhere and your friend wants to light up, maybe you can step into a store or something to avoid dealing with it.  It just depends how you feel when it is happening.
   
   Remember, you are going to face these kinds of challenges on a regular basis.  Part of the quitting process is learning how to deal with day-to-day situations without smoking.