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4 and a bit month update

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13 posts, 0 answered
  1. ocean
    ocean avatar
    286 posts
    Registered:
    29 Nov 2017
    21 May 2018
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    I'm slippin guys, but this time near relapsing.  I recommit to my quit today.  One thing I can say is that it feels so familiar to smoke again.  So darned mad about that!  I'll be hanging around daily again to re-focus on being completely smoke free.  Keep it up warriors!!  We will get there!
  2. treepeo
    treepeo avatar
    832 posts
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    29 Nov 2017
    21 May 2018
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    Hi Ocean,

    I get it.  Smoking is something we always did, so it feels weird not to smoke, and it feels so natural to start again.  But man Ocean, you have come so far and worked so hard, I would hate to see you totally give in.  So I am glad you have decided to re-commit to the process.  You know the drill.  Baby steps.  The four Ds.  Your list of reasons for quitting smoking.  Your rewards for good behaviour.  Try to do whatever it takes to stick with the plan.  You can do it, Ocean, I know you can, but slips make it so, so hard.  That is why we have to live by NOPE.  And keep posting, Ocean.  We are all here for you.
  3. jennifer, quit coach
    jennifer, quit coach avatar
    103 posts
    Registered:
    29 Nov 2017
    21 May 2018 in reply to ocean
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    Good Evening ocean,

    Hang in there! 

    Catching this slip before it becomes a full relapse is so important, we know that slips happen, it's the members like you who will succeed, but taking what they can from a slip and recommitting to a quit!

    Come by anytime - you know we're here for you!
  4. brieffree
    brieffree avatar
    1477 posts
    Registered:
    28 Nov 2017
    22 May 2018 in reply to ocean
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    Hi Ocean

    I am sorry to hear that, you were so good for a wile, I know you can do it.
    Don't be so hard on you and focus in your quit!

    One day at the time!
  5. eagerquit
    eagerquit avatar
    415 posts
    Registered:
    07 Mar 2018
    22 May 2018
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    Hi Ocean,

    Sorry to hear you are struggling. I know how very hard it is to turn away from the familiar path of so many years. The most natural thing for me in the past was to roll out of bed in the morning, make a coffee and immediately light up. I think of my quit journey these past several months as an exploration of a new and better way of life, learning how to live- smoke free- and enjoying the process. I know how hard you have worked at this and that you will succeed in your own quit journey. Your determination has been an inspiration to me.

    An expression I keep in mind is: "Today is the first day of the rest of your life." I would like that to be a long one.

    I wish you every success on your quit path one day at a time.

    Eagerquit

  6. nerak47
    nerak47 avatar
    48 posts
    Registered:
    23 Jan 2018
    22 May 2018
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    Good morning Ocean 

    I feel for you! And whatever is going on for you, I hope you will be gentle with yourself...no sense in staying in the guilt or shame business ~ we were given behinds so that when we do fall, we have something soft to land on ( that is if we don't fall forwards, face down).  
    The battle of our own minds can drive a person crazy , I am well aware of that..and I am really grateful to find, share and retell stories on here, and to encourage others same ways I've found helpful...helps me get out of my mind and into action. 
    It's good to read your recommittment and I look forward to more reads from You!!!! 

    nerak
  7. ocean
    ocean avatar
    286 posts
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    29 Nov 2017
    23 May 2018
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    Hey thanks you guys.  Well, you know how I started to have the odd slip, every 3 weeks or so starting in month 2 or 3?  I was like that, but then instead of throwing away the pack after one, I decided to finish it over a few days.  Then I'd be without anything and a week would go by, and I'd do it again, smoke the whole pack over several days.  Last week I started smoking regularly, and it was so easy to slip into that pattern.  So here I am, reigning in my horns and kicking that habit away again.  It felt weird and guilty to smoke, but once it became a bit regular it was like I hadn't even stopped.  It was thoughtless, motor memory, and I wasn't paying attention( which I confess I liked).  So here goes to paying attention again!!!  Aghhh, that addiction is so ingrained in our thinking and behavior.  But if I continue lke this, I'll be a regular smoker again and I don't ever want to do that again.  I realize that I smoke so many cigarettes out of a mindless habit, even when I don't have a craving for one.  How dumb is that???  Thank God for SHO and this community!!
  8. brieffree
    brieffree avatar
    1477 posts
    Registered:
    28 Nov 2017
    23 May 2018
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    Hi Ocean

    You are not the only one who fell for it again and again, then quit again, and again....
    I been there until I realize that I was smoking again, So, I made an other Quit Plan, I went to by the Gum 4 Mg, and I use the Mist.

    I been free of smoking or slipping or even thinking about it!
    All because, I am Human made as Good Image; so I am not Perfect, but I know what I want, is to Free!

    Give your self an other chance! You deserve it! You are work it!
  9. treepeo
    treepeo avatar
    832 posts
    Registered:
    29 Nov 2017
    23 May 2018
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    You know, Ocean, you are way stronger than I am.  When you first started to mention that you had a slip, and then got back on the bandwagon again right away, I thought, wow.  How did she do it?  Because I know for me, if I have one cigarette, no, make that one puff of one cigarette, I will be right back to the drawing board.  I know that in my heart.  I know that I have to live by NOPE, Not One Puff Ever, or I am doomed.

    I remember at one point in my quit, I was coming home from doing groceries.  The wind was really strong against me, and I started huffing and puffing.  And just when I took a really deep breath, a man coming towards me exhaled from his cigarette, and I inhaled the whole thing before I could stop myself.  And I went into a complete panic, wondering if my quit had just been blown.  Thankfully, I guess because I didn't actually take a drag myself, I was fine.  But it terrified me, it really did.

    So you are absolutely right.  You have to stop this slip in its tracks now, or you will be right back where you started.  And you deserve so much better than that.  Smoking is a horrible addiction, and it will do anything to keep us in its grip.  Fight back, and be the winner of this battle.  I am rooting for you.
  10. eagerquit
    eagerquit avatar
    415 posts
    Registered:
    07 Mar 2018
    24 May 2018
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    Hi Ocean,

    Since I quit several months ago, I have at various times tried to conjure up a way to be an occasional smoker, controlling how much I smoke. Maybe have just a few a day sort of thing. Being honest with myself is job one. I have always concluded this would never work for me. If I bought a pack, I know I would smoke them all, one after another until they were all gone. My addiction would immediately take over.

    A new quit plan might be a good idea. Brieffree is using 4 mg gum. I used 4 mg lozenges and gum then switched to 2 mg. I prefer the lozenges and still pop an occasional one when the "stinking thinking" starts up. My "Reasons for Quitting List" and my rewards program help me a lot. I am currently working on the "making a beautiful garden and yard" item in my bucket list. It is a real joy sitting in the yard now.

    All the very best in your quit.

    Eagerquit
  11. beth77
    beth77 avatar
    8 posts
    Registered:
    21 Feb 2018
    03 Jun 2018
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    Hi Ocean! I feel like I’m in the same boat- just finishing up 2 weeks holidays where I unfortunately relapsed. I’m recommitting to my quit-tomorrow I’m back to work and back into a routine and will continue my quit journey. My next set of holidays is almost 3 months away so I’m hoping I get enough time under my belt to resist the urge once I have all this free time again! It’s hard and I was so tired trying to fight the cravings but I’m not going to give up the quit. This journey started 3 months ago and I don’t want to start all over again so going to keep going! Fingers crossed for both of us! 😊
  12. eagerquit
    eagerquit avatar
    415 posts
    Registered:
    07 Mar 2018
    04 Jun 2018
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    Good Morning Beth77 and Ocean,

    I know how easy it is to relapse. Two years ago, I had five months smoke free then started smoking again until quitting for good three months ago. The last time I did not have the support of the smoker's help line forums. Stay posted and we will all do this together!

    Eargerquit
  13. emily, quit coach
    emily, quit coach avatar
    247 posts
    Registered:
    28 Nov 2017
    04 Jun 2018
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    Good morning,

    Thank-you for sharing your experiences. Slips can be a common part when quitting, but it doesn't mean you have to give up on your quit. It's great to hear how many of you have been motivated to get back on track after a slip. Use it as a learning experience and continue on.

    Have a great smoke free day everyone,
    Emily
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