Welcome, hellothere! When you say that you're going to do it this time for sure, I believe you! You sound very focused and determined.
Brieffree, thanks for those suggestions. To go along with what you said about talking to the husband to enlist his support, we do have a good conversation starter available for download here: Help A Smoker Quit
About your concerns re: patches and gum, a few things that it may help to know: for someone who typically smokes 10 or more cigarettes per day, patches or gum can effectively double the chances of quitting successfully. These nicotine replacements are much safer than smoking: they have nicotine, but none of the chemicals that make cigarettes so harmful to one's health.
Most people have no side effects or brief ones; rarely any serious ones. Patches may cause skin irritation and/or vivid dreams, and nicotine gum can cause jaw or throat irritation, mouth ulcers, hiccups and upset stomach. With the nicotine gum, side-effects are more likely if it's not chewed properly (there should be instructions included).
That being said, it's best to consult with your doctor before using these if you have a major health concern or medical condition.
Hope this helps,