23 Jan 2018
Link to this post
Happy 'hump day' everyone,
Well! I made 2 whole weeks smoke free!
Today I feel like I can see clearly now (the rain has gone) and I feel pretty alright today!
I can totally relate to the saying "everything I have let go of, has claw marks all over it". The cravings made me want to be sneaky and at times made me feel self centered and discouraged- and the fight was on. And fight I did!!!!
2 weeks doesn't sound like a long time, but when you have to challenge yourself for 14 days, it is/was exhausting. I feel like I need to recuperate lol.
Redefining my identity as a non smoker, means a whole lot of self awareness in order for me to stay smoke free. I still will need to make a conscience choice to stay quit, and challenges will come unexpectedly and I have to make future commitments as well...(getting lost going somewhere causes me anxiety and NEED that smoke - like smoking is help get me unlost). And yet, I still can only stay quit for short chunks of time!
Holy geez, talk about a lot of thinking about smoking...I can't wait for the day to come when I don't have to focus on staying quit, and just carry on with life ...but still ~☆2weeks☆ is quite the accomplishment for this old long time smoker....I bought a 4 pack of root beer as my reward lol.
On to my 15 day of being a non smoker and the end of my rant for the day