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Ocean's journey

146 posts, 1 answered
  1. treepeo
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    Ocean,

    I agree with Marianne.  YOU ROCK!!!  You made it through a whole month.  Following your journey, where does the time go?  I know you have been through hell, but you are coming back on the winning end.  Yay!!!  I am so happy for you, Ocean!  You really inspire me.

    Keep the quit, Ocean.  I am rooting for you!  You have come so far, and you are going to achieve even greater things.  I just know it.  ROCK ON!
  2. lithan44
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    12 Feb 2018
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    Ocean!!  What a delight to logon and see that you are a month into your quit.  Woot Woot!  I read your posts to catch-up and you have worked through some intense cravings - I am so proud of you!
  3. dedi
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    Congratulations !!! Ocean....33 days for me Yay!!!
    Last modified on 04 Mar 2018 21:20 by Quit Coach 9
  4. ocean
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    13 Feb 2018
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    Day 30
    Hi Dedi, Congratulations on your 33 days!  I can't say it's a month yet for me until the 15th of February.  And Hi Lithan!  It's great that you checked in, sorry about the novel this verbally post has become, how are you holding on?  And Treepeo, thanks so much.  You've been helping me since October and I'm so glad you didn't give up on me.  And to all of the Quit Coaches too, a million thanks for keeping me company and for all of your support.  

    I have to say, I smelled a coffee and cigarettes when I was madly filling my car with gas early on Monday morning, and I just wanted to buy some as it still smelt good, especially paired with the coffee smell.  But I didn't and I left and didn't obsess about it much after I left.  That's HUGE for me.  And I've had easy days and not so intense cravings, ones that I can easily fight by distracting etc...

    Keep up the brave quit my friends, we are warriors!
  5. ocean
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    14 Feb 2018
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    1 Month!
    And I went to a make up counter and bought some Spring lipstick shades and eye-shadows tonight!  My reward is playing with make up, like actually blending colours instead of slapping it on.
    I forgot to put my Patch on until noon, I didn't even realize it and I had morning coffee.  I need a few more good days under my belt before I have an off day.  To be honest the excitement of the lipstick had me craving a bit, but I just parked a nicorette gum there and waited it out.

    And can we talk about the glorious 'hint of Spring' weather the last few days?  It got up to 2 or 3C. today and was brilliantly sunny out.  Thank You for this gorgeous winter day, and for the kids that I teach who enjoyed snow races outside today!!

    Come on my brave ragamuffins, we got this!
  6. lillian, quit coach
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    15 Feb 2018 in reply to ocean
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    Hi Ocean,

    Good days are cause for celebration!
    It is so much fun to do something like play around with makeup, enjoying and being grateful for the day rather than smoking and feeling guilty..

    Great fun and I hope it stays with you, you've worked so hard.
    1 month.!! Congratulations!
    or as exsmokersoon said in another post "WOOT!WOOT!"

    Lillian
  7. treepeo
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    Ocean, you're just past a month now.  A big congratulations to you!  Man oh man, you have come so far - you should be super, duper proud of yourself!

    Keep waiting out those stupid craves.  They will come and go less and less over time.  You just have to be patient.  But it seems that you have already discovered that.

    You are NAILING your quit, Ocean!  Keep it up!  You deserve to live a smoke free life!
  8. ocean
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    16 Feb 2018
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    Day 33

    Hello, Good news from the Heart Institute today:  I breathed a 2 on the Carbon Monoxide breathalyzer, instead of a 29 from last month.  I beat the machine!  I also got the advice to stay on my 21 mg. Patches for another month, and then decrease if all goes well.  I'm starting to think in terms of days I can stay clean instead of half days, so that's where my confidence lies at the minute.  I have gained 9 pounds which she said was normal, so I won't fret about it.  Besides I know I could probably lose 4 after I drop my temporary chocolate cravings, and I'm still in my standard clothing size so I don't have to buy new yet.  I'm also visualizing my blood vessels and reduction of plaque, I want them wide and clear to get me to my retirement years when i  plan to live abroad for 6 months so I can travel while still mobile.  I didn't get the coughing yet, and she said some people don't, that the lungs clear in other ways too, so I don't know if I'm going to get that symptom.  And the horrible times trying to distract myself in past attempts probably meant I wasn't on a high enough dose of NRT, so supplementing my 21 mg. Patch with gum, or other oral NRT really helped this time.  Before my cravings would last a very long time, whereas this time I can perceive a definitive period.  It all helps, all of my quit attempts have helped so much in making this one last this long, and knowing it gets hard around the 60-90 day mark has me knowing I'm not out of the woods.  But I think staying on NRT is the trick with this.
    Have a great weekend warriors, we can do it!
  9. linda, quit coach
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    16 Feb 2018
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    Hi Ocean,

    Congratulations for all the hard work you’ve done to reach Day 33! We are so happy for you! Your persistence and determination is something to be really proud of -way to go! Your quitting process was not easy but you’ve worked so hard and persevered, now you have 33 days behind you – your tenacity and strength is so great! What an accomplishment! Keep up with the positive thinking, those NRT's and the great visualizations. You can do this! Take care.

    Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

    Linda
    Last modified on 16 Feb 2018 21:43 by linda, quit coach
  10. ocean
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    19 Feb 2018
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    Day 36 End of the Long Weekend
    Hi Guys, I'm starting to lose track of my days not smoked, because I was enagaged and not thinking about it too much this past long weekend.  What a great sign!  I've become able to do my "old routine" without thinking too much about smoking.  I went out for drinks with a friend (coffee) who smokes and we'd typically run out to smoke upon leaving, but it wasn't until I got home that I realized it.  Bit by bit my life is feeling more routine now and I just naturally distract myself without making a conscious effort to not think about smoking, or craving, or staying busy, or fatigue.  Life is getting better, yay!
  11. paul, quit coach
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    20 Feb 2018 in reply to ocean
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    That is a great sign Ocean. Thank you for sharing, and congratulations on your success. You have certainly earned it.

    Have a great smoke free day everyone.
    Paul
  12. ocean
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    20 Feb 2018
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    Hi everyone,
    I just had to write in and announce that I put a bike on layaway this evening.  I just have to put $200 down for a few more months and it's mine!  This will be my big reward.  I'm so excited for it, and I'll need to ride around to lose some of this weight I'm gaining  It's a real nice bike, that has upright handlebars so is very comfortable on my back, very retro.  We had mild weather with rain which fooled me into thinking Spring was arriving, lol.  It won't for another 2 months, but at least I'll have paid off the bike by then.
    Cheers,
    Ocean
  13. ocean
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    24 Feb 2018
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    Day 40, woot!!

    The last 10 days have been easy compared to the first 4 weeks  I can't believe the difference.  And I haven't been putting on patches the last three days, due to sleeping in a bit ... not planned, lol!  But now i'm wondering if I'll jinx myself if I go off the Patch and just use gum instead??  In the past, I've tended to relapse around day 60 to 100, but I also struggled harder than I am now.  So I don't know what I'll do?  I feel sleepy like I did when I went on the Patch, almost like a day 5 again.  But I haven't had any bad craves, just subtle thoughts that are there more than before.
  14. treepeo
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    27 Feb 2018
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    Hi Ocean,

    I am so happy to hear that you are on Day 44 or so.  Congratulations!  You have worked so hard and endured so much.  Now it is finally starting to get a bit easier.  That is what happened to me, too.  The first month was hell, but after that, the cravings really started to drop off.

    And you are no longer obsessed with smoking.  The longer you are smoke free, the less you will even think about it.  You are starting to create new memories as a non-smoker.

    It's great that you can ride a bike.  That will probably give you great joy in the nice weather, and it will help to strengthen your lungs.  And of course, it will help you lose any weight you have gained.

    Keep the quit, Ocean.  Life is so much better as a non-smoker!
  15. ocean
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    01 Mar 2018
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    Day 46 bad grumpy mood

    im very grumpy.  This is Day 3 of frustration and restlessness.  I don’t think I’m craving, but I m having psychological urges to smoke.  I won’t do it and try to nap instead.  
  16. marianne, quit coach
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    Hello Ocean,

    You mentioned you haven't put on the patches recently so this will contribute to how you are feeling.  Are you using the nicotine gum now?  Any other ways that help you when feeling restless and frustrated?  

    You have so much to look forward in the Spring with your new bike.  

    Take care Ocean,

    Marianne
  17. ocean
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    Hi Marianne, I’ve been wearing a 14 mg  Patch the last 2 days and chew 4 pieces of Nicolette gum.  My body is achy, but that’s not a withdrawal symptom is it?  I’m trying to ride out the grumpy mood and wish I had my new bike at home.  But I’m too tired to except use and not tired enough to sleep, it’s that awful in between stage.  argh, hopefully I’ll feel better soon!
  18. lillian, quit coach
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    02 Mar 2018 in reply to ocean
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    Hi Ocean,

    In the past, you were using the spray and the inhaler? Are you are working on your nrt dosing with the Heart Institute? You mentioned staying on the 21mg for a month more but it seems its changed?


    Tiredness, achiness, irritability are common withdrawal symptoms but they can be related to other things going on in our lives too, so it's hard to determine what might be contributing. Dropping the patch nicotine levels or not wearing the patch, it is possible it is withdrawal. I hope you are still working with the team, maybe they can help tease out the answer?

    It will be nice to see if you are a 2 again on the carbon monoxide meter or if it is possible to get even lower when you do see them next.

    I do hope you feel better  soon. Hang in there ocean.
    Lillian




  19. ocean
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    03 Mar 2018
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    Thanks Lillian, maybe it is some withdrawal after all?  I didn’t know body aches were a symptom.  I’ve had an earache and a sore throat so I assumed I had a virus, but maybe it’s both?  I was supposed to stay on the 21 mg for another 2 weeks, but I decided to go down to the 14mg because I wasn’t having cravings.  And I know I can supplement with the spray or gum, so I decided on this route.  I always think of craves now, and forget about withdrawal symptoms so I’m glad you’ve reminded me.
    Last modified on 04 Mar 2018 21:23 by Quit Coach 9
  20. ocean
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    Day 48 - 8 weeks tomorrow

    I made it!  Today was easier again because I felt much calmer.
    Last modified on 04 Mar 2018 21:17 by Quit Coach 9
  21. marianne, quit coach
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    Hello Ocean,

    Congratulations on your success!  You must be feeling amazing and calmer, so nice to know.  

    Have a wonderful week ahead, any treats to self you have?  

    Keep us posted.  

    Marianne
    Last modified on 04 Mar 2018 21:06 by marianne, quit coach
  22. treepeo
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    8 weeks - Ocean, you should be so proud of yourself!  You are getting it done, yippee!  You should give yourself some kind of treat, because you really deserve it!

    It's true that even though your cravings are diminishing, you may still experience withdrawal symptoms.  Remember to keep your guard up, because psychologically, you may get some feelings that you want to light up.  This addiction will do its very best to keep you in its grip, so you have to stay diligent.  From time to time, it still crosses my mind that I would enjoy a cigarette, even though that is the furthest thing from the truth.  I suspect I will always have to battle this addiction on some level.  But it really does get much easier over time.

    You have come so far, Ocean, and I honestly believe that it will get much easier for you soon. Keep the quit and enjoy the freedom!
  23. ocean
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    10 Mar 2018
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    Day 55

    Well, I've got good news and bad news.  The good news is that I got over that hell week of a week ago, this past week, and everything is back on track psycholigically speaking (as in not hurting, and over the virus that brought me down, or impatient and going insane with urges and cravings!)!  But the bad news is I had a slip yesterday.  I've posted about it in the Cravings forum and it was so minor in comparisson with the week before and I learned another lesson.  I'm puzzled by the differences between urges, and cravings, and withdrawal as a result of that horrible week.  I use urges for when it doesn't feel like a true craving that passes.  To me an urge is physical and psychological distress which makes me want to smoke, and boy, are they ever hard to get through.  They're much harder than a craving which comes on, but goes, and you can feel the swell of it like riding a wave.  So I don't know if urges are brought on by withdrawal or what???  I hadn't been dosing myself correctly for several days when I hit the "urges week from hell".  And I can't wait to go to my quit program next week and ask them.  I've been using a 14mg. Patch and using the gum (4 or 5 a day).  So I have officially weaned down from the 21 mg. Patch.
  24. Decided
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    10 Mar 2018 in reply to ocean
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    ocean
    i found that i do not very often think about having a cigarette when i chew nicorettes
    i think i average about 8 a day
    sorry you lost your dad
    all my best to you in your journey
  25. marianne, quit coach
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    Hello Ocean,

    Great to hear that through your slip, you gained understanding. Urges can be brought on by withdrawal.  Withdrawal is challenging and has brought people back to smoking.  Weaning off can bring on those urges.  You can use more nrt gum in those times.  And like you said reviewing your dosing with the quit program you going to will really help.  

    All the best to you, keep us posted.  

    Marianne
  26. ocean
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    OMG Marianne, I need to save this as its own topic!  I get so confused by it all as I try and understand it when I'm in the moment.  So now I know for sure that in my past quit attempts it was the urges associated with withdrawal that brought me down!  And this is maybe why I tended to fail around the 60-90 day mark because I used to feel so tired of fighting so hard.  I guess the message for me is o be very careful as I withdraw from NRT, because I get very disressed and sore when I do.  Last year I battled a depression that got worsened as I was tryng to quit.  My meds had to be adjusted etc..., and I gave up the quit because it felt too hard.  Now I know that I would have probably still had the depression anyway, but withdrawl really does interefere with my brain chemistry if I don't do it properly.

    I haven't felt depressed this quit, but I did feel tired out during that horrible week I had - the hours went on forever it felt.

    I think I'm learning a thing or two about why I wasn't successful in the past, yay me!  We ned a topic called Urges vs. Cravings vs. Withdrawals:  Compare and Contrast.

    And thanks Decided!  I'm journeying on, hugging tight to SHO and my supports, getting through everything one dy at a time.  That's great that you only need 5 pieces of gum a day.  If I forget the Patch, I'd probably need 10 gums a day.  But someone here said 7 doses of gum equals a Patch.  But I don't really kow ow they measure the dosing.  But both the Patch and the gum are slow acting, compared to the spray or lozenge.
  27. marianne, quit coach
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    Hello Ocean,

    You keep getting revelation for yourself.  Your brain chemistry is definitely affected as you make changes with your smoking.  Mild depression can be symptomatic as you cut back and/or go cold turkey.  However, with existing depression where you are medicated, the meds may need to be adjusted.  So it is always important for your doctor/health care professional to know that you are quitting and to monitor your symptoms.  Interesting how with this quit you haven't felt depressed.  You haven't had it easy lately so being tired makes so much sense.  

     Withdrawal symptoms are your bodies response to less nicotine or no nicotine in your system.   As a result, people will experience urges/cravings (people typically note them to be the same).  These urges/cravings can be either physical/mental or both.  

    You can certainly do this, your doing amazing!  Keep asking questions, it is the way to have those Ah ha moments that we really need to be successful.  

    Have a restful week ahead!  

    Marianne
  28. ocean
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    14 Mar 2018
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    March 14th, 2018  Day 59 or 2 months in!!!

    So far so good!  I can't believe I'm 2 months in and still here!  One thing I attribute to my success so far is not relapsing when I had a slip.  I've had 2, one on day 17, and one on day 51 or so.  I can't really allow slips into my thnking because I would slip a lot more.  But I thought from the start to not get caught up if I slip because I've regretted relapses in the past.  I remeber my last quit and I was three or four weeks along and slipped which lead to a relapse, and I later thought I shouud have just kept going anyway.  So I can't let it affect my morale.  It's so funny how in hindsight you see the errors of your ways.

    I'm going to celebrate with a chocolate bar or 2!  I did my nails today, another new habit to pass the time.  And I'm going to pick up some 2mg. gum (instead of 4 mg.), because I now get urges for the gum (there's something about it's texture that I prefer), and I don't want to increase my NRT.  I chew more gum on non work days, like weekends and holidays.

    I want to get fit now, and start strenghtening my leg muscles around my knee's so I can walk without my usual Spring arthritic pain and overuse pains.  I just feeel like prancing down the street, lol!

    Have a great day guys, we're doing it!!
  29. treepeo
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    Hey Ocean, you go girl!  2 months already, that's fantastic!  For sure, get your nails done.  Pamper yourself a bit, or a lot, you deserve it!  And keep forging ahead.  You are strong enough to keep the quit.

    And if you figure out how to get rid of arthritis in the knees, let me know.  My right knee has not reacted well to going down stairs this winter - ouch!
  30. ocean
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    Hey Treepeo!  Thanks so much, and yes, the stairs have been bad this winter for my arthritis too!  I got a prescription compression brace, one that a friend recommended, and its amazing.  I only use it when I can't weight bear, so I don't lose any muscle.  I can tell you the brand if you want, but it's way better than the others and it was covered by my health insurance.  I was also told to use the elastic bands they use for pilates for resistence.  cycling and swimming and some kind of weights.  My knee swells up every Spring as soon as I get more active, and I'm already feeling it in rest.  So I just ice and heat away and use the compression at night when I sleep to keep it from locking or swelling too much.  But I definately have to ease in to some strentgh now after a winter of not walking very far.  Quitting smoking is very good for arthritis!!
     
146 posts, 1 answered