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My husband smokes (won't quit) and I'm having trouble resisting when he has them!

10 posts, 0 answered
  1. jessicagee
    jessicagee avatar
    1 posts
    Registered:
    01 Aug 2018
    01 Aug 2018
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    Hello!

    I've attempted to quit 3 days ago. I can go all day just fine by using the 4 Ds, but when my husband gets home and smells like cigarettes, its almost unbearable! I have smoked 2 cigarettes each night since because they've been available. Any tips would be greatly appreciated!
  2. brieffree
    brieffree avatar
    1331 posts
    Registered:
    28 Nov 2017
    01 Aug 2018 in reply to jessicagee
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    Hello jessicagee


    Welcome to help line,

    Like you said you attempted to quit, why is good, you need to tell Him That your quit is Important to you and you need to be prepare for that moment.

    I now is hard, but harder is not even try!

    Maybe is you drink a glass of water in that moment helps you.

    Hang in there, you can do it! if you quit He will later...


  3. eagerquit
    eagerquit avatar
    410 posts
    Registered:
    07 Mar 2018
    01 Aug 2018
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    Hi jessicagee,

    It would certainly be challenging having the temptation to smoke so available. Make a list of your reasons for quitting and put it in a place you look at a lot, like on the fridge. Let your husband know these reasons are so very important to you. You might consider an NRT for those tempting times such as a nicotine lozenge or piece of nicotine gum.

    Wishing you every success in your quit.

    Eagerquit
  4. treepeo
    treepeo avatar
    803 posts
    Registered:
    29 Nov 2017
    01 Aug 2018
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    Hi jessicagee,

    Wow, you are in a really tough situation.  It's hard enough to quit as it is, but when you are around someone who smokes, especially a spouse, it is 10x worse.

    I think what you have to do is to keep telling yourself you are serious about quitting.  Make a list of all the reasons why you want to quit, and read it often.  We are all faced with temptations of one kind or another when we quit smoking.  It is how we handle those temptations that make the difference.  We have to keep telling ourselves that we are choosing not to smoke, and that choosing not to smoke is the right thing to do for us, regardless of what anyone else says or does.

    There is no definitive handbook on how to quit.  We learn as we go.  You have already recognized some problems and are thinking about how to deal with them.  That is the best that we can do.  Don't worry, jessicagee, you will figure it out.

    Please keep us posted about how you are doing.  And remember, you can always call the helpline for extra support.  We are all here for you.
  5. lillian, quit coach
    lillian, quit coach avatar
    188 posts
    Registered:
    28 Nov 2017
    02 Aug 2018
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    Hey everyone,

    Jessicagee. You are in a very tempting situation. Keeping those reasons top of mind and using NRT are great suggestions to help you get through it. I would like to add, just keep practicing. Use deep breathing, drinking water, a distraction and delay as long as you can. As you try, you will find the right thing that helps and not only that, over time,it is going to get easier and you will be able to do it.

    Hang in there jessicagee!
    Lillian

  6. eva76
    eva76 avatar
    2 posts
    Registered:
    28 Jul 2018
    06 Aug 2018
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    Hi Jessiccagee,

    I am on day 7 without a cigarette, my partner smokes a pack a day. It has been a really difficult week. I am finding that it helps me to get up and clean or cook when he comes in from having a smoke. I also use essential oils which is helping me. I find my partner is not being supportive of me quitting at all. He is trying to pick a fight almost every day, I just leave the room. I have cried a lot this week. But so proud of myself for finally quitting!
    I wish you the very best of luck! :-)
  7. eagerquit
    eagerquit avatar
    410 posts
    Registered:
    07 Mar 2018
    06 Aug 2018
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    Hi eva76,

    Congratulations on seven days without a cigarette. That is a great achievement! Getting through that first week is tough and a milestone to be proud of. It is good to hear the essential oils are working for you. You are setting an example to others and I wish you continued success.

    Eagerquit
  8. treepeo
    treepeo avatar
    803 posts
    Registered:
    29 Nov 2017
    06 Aug 2018
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    Hi eva76,

    Way to go for making it through your first week!  That is wonderful, and good for you!

    I am sorry to hear that your husband has not been supportive of your quit.  I had the same problem with two of my sisters.  They never supported me at all when I was trying to quit.  I think that as a smoker, if you aren't ready to quit yourself, you resent someone who is making the effort to quit.  Every smoker knows that they should quit, but they also know it won't be easy.  So if someone else makes the effort, they may try to sabotage them so that they can then say, well see, she couldn't do it and I can't either.  Sad, but true.

    All I can say is, hang in there eva76.    Becoming a non-smoker will change your life for the better.  You are stronger than your addiction.   Kick butt, you deserve it!
  9. eva76
    eva76 avatar
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    Registered:
    28 Jul 2018
    07 Aug 2018 in reply to eagerquit
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    Thank you for the kind words. It means a lot. :-)
  10. jenna lee, quit coach
    jenna lee, quit coach avatar
    151 posts
    Registered:
    28 Jun 2018
    07 Aug 2018
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    Hi everyone,

    Asking for support and getting support are a hot topic in smoking cessation. eva76 and jessicagee, definitely give yourselves a lot of credit for quitting, even with other smokers around. 

    I like to share the 3 A's when it comes to being around other smokers:

    AVOID: It is a tough one, especially if it is in your own home, but walk away if you need to
    ALTER: Make a new response to the situation. For example, let them know not to offer you under any circumstances,
    ACCEPT: Sometimes we cannot change the situation we are in, so positive self-talk and other strategies such as ones mentioned earlier in this feed are helpful.

    Hope this helps too,

    Jenna Lee
10 posts, 0 answered